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Unconditional Worth


Let me just get something out there: I don't care what people's view of my children is. That may sound harsh, but it's true.

Whether or not others approve of them doesn't even cross my mind. I'm not putting them on a pedestal for people's accolades, and I am not comparing them to other children for their worth. I am fully aware that my kid isn't perfect. I'm not trying to make anyone think they are. I know that my kid isn't the best at everything, and I'm not interested in proving otherwise.

I'm not a player in the competition game among parents. There is no jealousy here. I'm perfectly happy with the two kids God gave me, and I don't need them to perform to keep me that way.

Whether someone thinks my kids are smart or dumb, funny or dull, tall or short, skinny or fat, pretty or ugly, athletic or not, I'm not letting others' judgments diminish the truth: My kids' worth is not dependent upon how they measure up.

I don't base my children's worth in their performance. I don't base my children's worth on if they got the trophy or if they made the team. I don't base my kids' value on if they made an A or if they didn't. Come as they are, they are mine, and I accept them as they are.

They will be ok. If they lose a match or miss out on an award or don't make the cut, they will be ok. If they aren't the fastest or the prettiest or the most popular, life is still good. They are mine, and I accept them as they are. There is so much they have to offer in a world that has so much to offer.

So when my son is on the court and makes that shot, I'll be his loudest cheerleader. When he is on that golf course and misses the putt, I'll be his biggest cheerleader. I'll teach him, "You win some, you lose some. Life is good." When my daughter is front and center on the stage, I'll love watching her. When she is in the back corner, I'll love watching her. I'll teach her, "You are more than the position you are given. Life is good."

And I'll teach them perspective. If you weren't in the center, someone else was...Be happy for them. If you didn't get the trophy, someone else did...Be happy for them. You'll have a turn at it one day. You win some, you lose some. Be a fan of others too, not just yourself.

So, don't worry about us. My children are not competing against yours. When your child wins, I'll be clapping along with you. And when your child loses, I'll still think your child is pretty great. There is more to them than that game they played.

God did not give my children to me to show THEM off. He gave them to me to show HIM off.